Wardrobe Self-Compassion- Breaking Up with Unworn Clothes in Your Closet
Kindness.
We are giving ourselves kindness.
Decluttering is a bit like a break up—it's never really easy. You have a few groups you need to get through, the don’t like, doesn’t fit and shouldn’t have bought it in the first place. Hard to tell which carries more guilt, but we’re going to treat them all with kindness first.
I had the same stories you might...I’d crack open my closet, and there they were—a fancy dress still hanging with the tag, a fabulous pair of shoes that are just a bit too high of a heel, that really fuzzy sweater that isn't quite the right color, but it's soooo soft! 😜
We've all been there...spending a little too much on something that ends up being a total "why did I buy this?" moment. Even when it's glaringly obvious that these items are just not working, the regret from those impulse purchases talks you into keeping them “just in case”.
Denver Closet Organization-overcoming the guilt
Sometimes saying goodbye is like parting with a piece of your past, maybe a reminder of a life you don't live right now or a body you may not be happy with. We can identify why we do things without piling on shame. When we know better, we can do better, right?
Why We Struggle to Let Go
Emotional attachments to past purchases
Guilt over money spent on unworn items
Hope of fitting into smaller sizes someday
Uncertainty about future style needs
Fear of making the same shopping mistakes
The struggles make us 180, and instead of tackling our closet, we choose the "out of sight, out of mind" route by slamming those closet doors shut. Oh if only that worked! Unfortunately, we need to open them again tomorrow morning, it never really goes away.
So lest you think I'm watching you in your closet, I'll remind you I played the same game for years. Silently beating myself up for recklessly spending was exacting a greater toll than the relief that came with finally letting it all go.
"But I paid so much for that!" I hear you say, with a tinge of regret and frustration, you put the item back in your closet. It's almost as if holding on validates the purchase. If I still own it, then it's not a waste, right?
Not really.
Let’s remind ourselves of the benefits! My clients always sigh and say “wow-it’s like I can breathe again!” That in itself is the best way to feel, but let’s not forget these⬇️
Benefits of Professional Closet Organization
Rediscover forgotten favorite pieces
Create a wardrobe that reflects your current lifestyle
Save time getting dressed each morning
Reduce shopping mistakes through personalized style guidance
Experience the emotional freedom of an organized space
Your Closet Therapist and Professional Stylist Tip-
Keeping things you don't use isn't going to get you your money back.
Facing the reality here—if you keep something that sits unworn, your money essentially went down the drain the moment you walked out of the store. Let's not ignore the mental angst of beating yourself up every time you look at it. Standing in your closet chastising yourself for a poor choice. You wouldn’t nag your friend like that, why are you doing it to yourself?
How much is your peace of mind worth?
And remember, you have decided to donate thoughtfully, to a local organization in your area that will make a big impact on the women in your community. Now letting go seems a whole lot more like giving back. No guilt here!!
Denver Personal Stylist Wisdom- It's Not Wasted Money If You Learn From Your Mistakes
So let’s talk about it- asking questions will help you figure out “why”, which is much more productive that just chucking it all in a bag to be donated!
Not only do I give you permission to move it along, I encourage you to think of it all as an educational expense. Take a few minutes to think about why you don't like it.
Is it a style you have grown out of? Great! Our style evolves as our life does, it's ok.
Is it a fit/fabric/sizing/seaming issue? Pay close attention to the things you don't like. It's incredibly helpful if you write it down somewhere (notes app, Post-it) so your brain will remember when you shop next. It’s pretty magical when you write things down, it makes it “sticky” and you will have a much better chance of remembering. So when you are about to get sucked in to the sale rack, your brain will alert you “Hey-don’t buy this, you don’t like Vnecks!”
Is it a size you aren't, but working to get back into? Awesome! But get it out of your space, or at least your immediate eyesight. Down the hall in another closet, in a box to be put in the basement or attic or under the bed boxes are wonderful for this. It is very rarely motivating to keep looking at a wardrobe that doesn’t fit. In fact, it usually does more harm than good, because we tend to beat ourselves up about it. An easy solution is to set yourself up to be looking at all the choices you have right now!
Taking Small Steps
Take what is annoying you in your closet and drop the guilt. Learn from what happened so you can make better decisions moving forward.
Does this sound a little overwhelming? Then just take it 2-3 pieces at a time. You didn't collect it all overnight, don't put pressure on yourself to purge it overnight. (Unless you want to, then I can help the process go much faster. ☺️)